I AM A HUMAN !!!

 

I AM A HUMAN !!!!!

 

Not so many years ago, if you called someone on the telephone you could reasonably expect that the person answering on the other end was actually alive.

Today, not so much any longer.

The rise of automation and artificial intelligence has changed our lives in such a way that you never know who or what you are really talking to or connecting with.

The problem starts when you call a number, and their answering system starts out with the various departments in their organization. None of which can handle the type of concern you are calling about. Of course, it would be too simple to just say the operator can be accessed by pressing “O”. that would be too simple and inefficient. I really am in love with those calls which tell you that “faster service can be obtained by logging into their website”. No way, Jose is that going to happen. I have spent hours on websites clicking various buttons in the forlorn hopes of finding a real person who can answer my questions. Their chat lines tie you up for hours on end and we all love the notation that says… ‘We will be with you in a moment, you are caller number 47’.

Now, when you go to various websites for advice on some issue or another, you get their lovely ‘virtual’ assistant. Virtual means ‘not real’ as in it’s actually a made-up entity of some sort. So, you aren’t talking or trying to talk to a human but a machine of some kind. I usually lose my patience with these bots after the fourth or fifth question that is totally unrelated to my inquiry. I have found that by saying ‘enchilada’ over and over it will usually bring me to a real person. Of course, then you have to start asking your questions all over again.

Another annoying practice of today is the ‘verify that you are a human’ authorization section. We are not given the option of talking or conversing with a real, live oxygen breathing human being, but they want to verify that we are actually alive. Seems somewhat unfair to me.

I don’t know about you, but I feel like an idiot after I find out that I have been speaking or writing to some robot for the last ten minutes.

The future doesn’t look too bright in view of the expansion of artificial intelligence, does it? None of us know who we can trust. The news can be faked, photos can be faked, documents can certainly be faked. Research can be changed. I have heard that AI can even duplicate voices and make calls sounding like your spouse or children. Of course, you can use this to your advantage if one of your kids or friends calls up and asks for money. You don’t send any and when they ask why in a few days or so, you can just say I thought you had been hacked and the call was a fraud.

My advice? Trust no one or anything.

Except me, I am a human. You can trust me.

See you next week…Peary Perry

KNOW YOUR LIMITATIONS----

 

KNOW YOUR LIMITATIONS--------

As you can probably tell, now that I have retired to the Springer Hills Retirement Home….I have more time on my hands to think about things I have overlooked or not had time to consider in many years.

The Springer Hill Retirement Home has two residents, very exclusive and no HOA to fool with. We do not anticipate any newcomers for at least twenty five more years.

It’s hay mowing season and I have been observing how this process works. First the hay gets mowed. Then it’s threshed? Or put into rows, then the baler comes by and runs over it and every so often a big round bale comes out.

So, as I’m watching this take place across the road, I see our neighbors’ field on fire. I hop in our mule/buggy and run over with two fire extinguishers which did little good on the growing blaze. Fortunately, more neighbors and the volunteer fire department show up to get everything under control. Disaster averted. The next day I am watching my neighbor work on his hay baler. A piece of equipment I know absolutely nothing about. He opens the back and crawls in for something. Then he opens a panel on the right side, and I can see all kinds of dials and controls. Then he opens a panel in the front which I presume has more controls. The point is farming is more complicated than I thought. So that lets me out of any thoughts I may have had about trying my hand at it. This leads me to the following discussion.

You see, I am the most un-mechanical person you have ever met. In my lifetime I have owned nine antique cars in my life. Why? I have no clue. I always thought I could fix them up and drive them, but alas that never happened. The best condition they were usually in was on the day I bought them. They went downhill from that point. My wife would ask me how I was doing when I came in the house from trying to work on these things. Many times, I told her that I fixed one thing but broke two more trying to fix the one. I think I though I could learn to repair something as complicated as an automobile by osmosis.

If it hadn’t been for my best friend in high school, I would probably have never been able to date. My first car (a red 1932 Chevrolet) wasn’t ‘cool’ so I traded it in for a 1953 Ford that looked much better but wouldn’t run. So, I had to call old Bob from a pay phone (no cell phones in the 60’s) and have him walk me through what to do. My dates were not impressed.  

But the one thing I am not is a quitter. So, I bought seven more over the remaining years with about the same degree of success. Right now, I have 1952 M-38A-1 Military Jeep sitting in my car port. It ran great until about a month ago when I decided to flush the radiator. How hard can that be? Well, I must have dislodged some old gunk in it that stopped up the cooling system and now it won’t run. I have ordered a new radiator and once it gets here, I am going to have it installed by a real mechanic and then sell the last albatross of my life. Never again for this folly.

Lesson to be learned ? Stay away from things you don’t know anything about or cannot understand.

See you next week….Peary Perry

HAPPY AS A CLAM---

 

HAPPY AS A CLAM-------

I don’t want you to get the impression that I am happy to be out of the big city or that I hated living in a big city the majority of my life. Big cities have been good to me and have allowed me to make a good living over all these years, but now it’s time to move onto to greener pastures.

After 68 years of working, I think God and one of my sons looked upon us and said, “Well done…now let’s kind of chill out for the rest of the years.”

So, my son built us a new house in the middle of a hay field in a town of about 280 people in central Texas.

We moved here in October of last year and it has taken some time to get used to it. We are exactly in the boondocks; we have a service station and Dollar General store. No stop lights, just one blinking light at an intersection. It is still hard for me to relax and learn to retire. I am so used to getting up each morning and putting on a suit and driving to the office. It is difficult to just have another cup of coffee and think about nothing. Retiring is a different lifestyle.

Instead of police and ambulance sirens, horns and such, we wake up to cows making cow noises and at night we hear the coyotes calling. We have lots of frogs, toads and fireflies. And clouds, you can see the entire sky. We have a tin roof which is a joy to hear when it rains. The lightening and thunder displays are awesome when it storms.

But most of all it is quiet. You can hear yourself think.

Maybe it’s just me, but in the big city, everyone seems in a hurry but here it’s a slower pace. Folks don’t seem as up tight and actually talk to you every chance they get. Went to the doctor the other day to get an allergy shot (we live in a hay field, remember? And a couple of days later the doctor’s office calls back wanting to know how I was feeling. cannot recall that happening before. I had to take an item back to a big box store for a refund. I was in and out in about 5 minutes. The last time I did that in Houston, I was in there for over an hour.

Our neighbors are some distances away, but they bring cookies, candy, vegetables just to be neighborly. The mail lady stops in for coffee and just to talk. When has that ever happened to you?

We walk about 2 miles in the mornings, folks stop and chat for a few minutes about everything. Gives me a chance to catch my breath. 

We miss our friends; we miss our neighbors. But at some point, in your life you must say ‘whoa’ and slow it down. Take a chill pill and learn to relax.

I think the Eagles had a line in one of their songs that went something like….”don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy”.

Color me relaxed….

See you next week…Peary